Be Still My Anxious Heart

Most mornings I am up just after 5am and hit the ground running (literally!) and don’t stop. It’s not that I am constantly on the go in my car. Actually I spend quite a bit of time at home in my own little corner with my computer, writing… right now working on some grants, Bible study lessons, a blog post here and there and a manuscript, to which I will share more information about in a future post:) It’s the kind of stuff that takes mental clarity and lots of focused uninterupted time.

But, it’s the uninterupted focused time that gets lost in between laundry, cooking, emails, texts, errands, meetings, carpooling, kids, football games… you know Life. The essentials and non-essential components that come with my main calling as a mom and a wife, including a lot of emotional extras that come with being a wife to a pastor.

This is what my world looks like, but I know YOU are busy, too! Just swap out some of my activities with yours and you probably feel a lot like I do. There just aren’t enough hours in the day!

Today my brain is on overload making it hard to even focus on one task to the next, feeling like I haven’t accomplished one thing! In the back of my head what I keep hearing is the verse I wrote about in last week’s post… 

Psalm 46:10 says “Be still, and know that I am God…

That post was about being still in the midst of trials, suffering and grief. But, isn’t God telling me the same thing on the days my heart just feels anxious?

“Be still, and know that I am God…”

So in placing aside everything that I need to be doing, I sit and ponder… and probe… write and pray, asking God to help me see where the root of the anxiety lies and to help me not to be overwhelmed.

Lord, help me “Be Still.” Help me get everything done.

And when I am finally still (or still enough) it occurs to me that I don’t have to get it all done today! Why do I feel pressured that I do?  When I trace that down I realize that I have put that pressure on myself because of my agenda and because of tomorrow’s agenda and next week’s agenda and then it’s Thanksgiving and then it’s Christmas… and then and then and then…

“Be still, and know that I am God…”

And, in Matthew 6:26-27:

“Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?”

He is going to take care of me. Just like in our passage from Psalm 46, He promises to be our refuge. Our safe haven. Our peace.

Ahhh- Peace. That is what I really want. I want peace today and tomorrow and during the holiday season. But in order to try to secure it, I have created unrest and lack of peace. I don’t need to worry today about three weeks from now. In fact, if I just focus on what needs to be done today, God promises me in His Word that tomorrow will be taken care of too.

So with that resolved, I don’t need to feel guilty that this grant didn’t get completed today and that next semester’s Bible study schedule and lesson overview isn’t planned (yes, I worry about things that far out!) Instead Help me, Lord, be OK with shutting this computer down for today, making dinner and cheering my football player on tonight.

Help me “Be Still“!

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3 thoughts on “Be Still My Anxious Heart

  1. Pingback: How Can We Be Still and Rest? | house of hatton

  2. Pingback: When Mothers’ Day Isn’t Happy | house of hatton

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